Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Bruce Jenner Jender

Congradulations to Mr. Bruce Jenner on his coming out on national TV exposing Transgender Change.  

The one definite thing the interview did was show that living with The Kardashians could possibly cause a Male Champion to cut of his Ding-dong, weiner, thingy, package, member, phallus, cock, penis, dick, ding-a-ling, pecker, peter, prick, putz, shaft, tool, johnson, manhood, schlong, willy, sausage, and/or wood!
Just kidding

At Least Shave an Adam's Apple

Run Bruce Run

Jump Every Hurdle
Even in a Girdle!

Drug Commercial Song

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Vault into Space

Firefighters spent five hours freeing two boozy revellers trapped in a disused bank vault.
The men dialled 999 on their mobile phones at 1.48am, fearing they were running out of oxygen.
The pair climbed into the underground vault during a party inside a former bank building in Cardiff, England.
Firemen drilled a hole to get fresh air into the vault and were able to talk to the men to keep them calm.
Specialist rescue teams then freed the red-faced but unharmed pair at 6.45am.


It makes sense when you think about it ... maybe.
A San Francisco man accused of burglarizing an apartment last May was acquitted earlier this week after his attorneys successfully argued that the suspect was actually attempting to board a spaceship he thought was on its roof.
Public defender Jeff Adachi told the court that Santonio Aviles, 41, was suffering meth-induced psychosis and believed the end of the world was here.
Aviles somehow convinced a resident of the building to let him into the complex. Once inside, he climbed onto the fire escape and found an open window that he used to enter an apartment and take a short nap.
When Aviles awoke, he threw an inflatable exercise ball onto the fire escape figuring he could use it as transportation into the next Galaxy. He also stole a backpack from the apartment and loaded it with a passport and earthquake kit in case the next Galaxy had none.
The passport wasn't Aviles'. It belonged to a woman who, like him, had long dark hair. Aviles testified that he believed the passport would ensure his seat on the spaceship, according to a release by the San Francisco Public Defender's Office.
At some point while Aviles was getting ready to leave Earth forever, the apartment resident and his girlfriend woke up to see a strange man in their home.
The resident tackled Aviles and began punching while the woman hit the suspect with a baseball bat. Then the pair called 911.
Aviles suffered a black eye and various bruises, scratches and scrapes, according to the release. The man who lived in the apartment suffered an injured toe and developed a rash from the encounter.  EWE A RASH!  SpaceRash

Wednesday, April 08, 2015

Monday, April 06, 2015

Dancing with the Stars

The First Openly Gay Football Player
who was on Dancing with the Stars 
Got Voted Off Tonite
and 
was Eliminated, 
Gone, 
Bye Bye.

Turns out,
All of The Dancers on The Show
Got Together and said,

"He's not gay enough!"

Sorry

NO PARKING A-HOLE

Thursday, April 02, 2015

White Guy

That guy is such a "White Guy" 

He thinks Human Struggle means getting out of Yoga Pants

He thinks Selma, Alabama is a point guard in the WNBA

When he met USHER at an Awards Show....
He asked him to take him to his seat

When he says he has an African Friend 
it's Oscar Pistorius

He thinks The Ferguson riots were about 
Craig Ferguson leaving Late Night