Friday, October 27, 2017

Locked In the Freezer

Ten minutes to midnight on Tuesday, Jeremy J. Van Ert stepped into a walk-in beer cooler at a Kwik Trip convenience store in Marshfield, Wis.
When the doors locked behind him at midnight, he decided that rather than shout for help, he would just camp out, police say.
Marshfield Police Chief Rick Gramza said that his department has dealt with people who intentionally hide and get locked inside places with the purpose of committing a crime but that this case was particularly unique.
“We never had somebody accidentally locked in a place and not make any attempt to be rescued or get out because they’re satisfied with the circumstances,” he said.
“He just decided to run it out for the night. It had everything that he needed.”
Six hours, one 18-ounce Icehouse beer and three cans of Four Loko later, Van Ert was spotted by a Kwik Trip customer who told an employee that a man was trapped inside.
When the doors unlocked shortly before 6 a.m., Van Ert, 38, “made a beeline from the beer cooler to the door without any attempt to pay for what he had consumed or broken,” Gramza said. Overnight, Van Ert had knocked over and broken three 30-packs of Busch beer, police records show.
A Kwik Trip corporate spokesman declined to comment on the case, citing a police investigation. It was unclear whether there were signs near the cooler that warned of the doors locking at midnight, or whether there were cameras inside the cooler that could have been used to spot Van Ert sooner. 
The cooler was reported to have temperatures around 32 degrees Fahrenheit.An employee who answered the phone at the Marshfield Kwik Trip, which operates 24 hours a day, referred questions to the corporate management. No attorneys were listed in police records, and Van Ert could not be reached for comment.
The walk-in cooler had glass doors that Van Ert could have knocked on to get an employee’s attention, police records show. Yet Van Ert “offered no explanation” for why he didn’t knock for help.
When police found Van Ert, he acknowledged being locked inside the cooler and that he “decided to stay and drink,” according to police records.
On Wednesday, Van Ert was cited for retail theft, which Gramza said was punishable by a roughly $170 fine plus restitution for the business.
Yet at the time of the incident, Van Ert was also on probation for previous criminal charges, including two counts of arson. Gramza said that because Van Ert got drunk and committed theft while on probation, he was transported to the Wood County Jail, where he remained, pending release from his probation officer.
“Off retail theft alone we probably wouldn’t have taken him to jail,” Gramza said. “He has certain guidelines he has to adhere to. The probation officer has the ability to lock him up.”
As news of the incident spread beyond Marshfield, some took to Twitter to offer some justification for Van Ert staying put.
 “A @KwikTrip beer cave is one of the few places on earth I’d be alright with being locked inside,” quipped one user.
“I mean . . . we all would have done the same,” admitted another.


Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Harvey Weinstein Fierstein

Harvey Fierstein has been inadvertently thrust into a sexual harassment scandal that’s shaken up Hollywood. 
On Oct. 5, The New York Times published a disturbing report detailing sexual harassment allegations against film producer and executive Harvey Weinstein, some of which dated back nearly three decades. After news of the allegations broke, the Weinstein Company fired the 65-year-old movie mogul, who co-founded the studio with his brother, Bob. The claims against Weinstein intensified Tuesday when the New Yorker published an investigative report, written by Ronan Farrow, that detailed rape allegations brought by three women. 
Unfortunately, the similar spellings of their surnames have lead many to confuse Weinstein for Fierstein, the legendary actor-playwright of “Torch Song Trilogy” fame and an LGBTQ rights icon. 
I just can’t believe all these accusations of sexual harassment about Harvey Fierstein,” one person wrote. “I always thought he was gay.” Added another: “Am I the only one who confused this weekend because I didn’t know Harvey Weinstein and Harvey Fierstein were two different people?”
On Oct. 6, before the rape allegations came to light, the 63-year-old posted a tongue-in-cheek tweet about being mistaken for Weinstein.

Later that same day, Fierstein tweeted a link to a story published by The Forwardthat acknowledged the confusion.

Be mad at Harvey,” he wrote, “not HARVEY!” 
He tweeted the link to The Forward’s story a second time Oct. 6, along with a classic Fierstein zinger. 

I'm a good gay! I mean, a good guy. - Guys, We're Mad At Harvey WEINSTEIN, Not Harvey FIERSTEIN! - 

Still, Fierstein wants to make it clear to his fans that the news involving Weinstein is not a joke. 


I’ve had some fun with the mix-up but, as you are well aware, the underlying issues of women being objectified is no laughing matter,” he told HuffPost. “So I think I am going to bow out of this discussion, stop making jokes, and let that story play itself out without my two cents.”

Wednesday, October 04, 2017

Trump Brooke Shields

Brooke Shields revealed the cringeworthy way in which President Donald Trump once asked her out.
On Tuesday’s broadcast of “Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen,” the 52-year-old actress said Trump called her following his divorce from second wife Marla Maples in 1999 ― and used a very cheesy chat-up line to try to woo her.
He said, ’I really think we should date because you’re America’s sweetheart and I’m America’s richest man and the people would love it,’” Shields explained.
The “Suddenly Susan” star fended off Trump’s advances, however, by telling him that she had a boyfriend who would “not really” be happy about it.
Shields’ revelation came during a game in which she had to guess whom she’d been pictured with over the years. When an old black-and-white snap of herself with Trump at a charity event popped up on the screen, she gagged and stuck her tongue out. “I can’t even speak,” she added
In recent months, actresses Salma HayekCandice Bergen and Emma Thompson have each come forward to share stories about turning down Trump.

Thompson admitted in March that she now actually regretted doing so. “I wish I had,” the British movie star told Sweden’s SVT. “Think of the stories!”

Saturday, September 30, 2017

Hooters Job

Always wondered about the beautiful women in tight orange shorts? What their rules and requirements on the job were? Here is the truth about working at Hooters, told from former employees of the restaurant chain. First up: the strict uniform rules. Girls must “scrunch” their thick white socks to make their legs look leaner. They are required to wear makeup, a minimum of lipstick and mascara, to appear “natural.” They also must purchase their own pantyhose, in “suntan,” and must never wear any other pantyhose color. A Hooters girl must know how to draw the infamous ketchup owl in ketchup on a plate! Yes, they have to be decent artists. The owl is the logo of the restaurant chain. Guests actually love this fun little party trick.

An employee of Hooters can not come to work or leave work in their uniform. They must wear clothes over it or change in the changing rooms when they arrive. This is apparently a “safety” issue. If a Hooters girl is seen outside of work drinking at a bar or eating at a restaurant in uniform, they will be fired.
Going to Hooters for the very first time is quite the experience. The “Hooters Virgin” is told to sit on his or her own, as the employees crowd around and put on a show. The girls sing and dance in a circle to the song, “Hokey Pokey,” and only leave when the customer is substantially embarrassed.


Over their training, Hooters girls learn choreographed dances to particular songs. These songs will be played during their shifts, and when they hear them, they must stop what they are doing and boogie

A wife or girlfriend receives better treatment from a Hooters girl than the male customers, to keep them from getting offended or jealous. The Hooters girls are trained to sit next to the woman and not the man. One Hooters girl even said that a woman ordered for her husband because she didn’t want anyone talking to him.


Hooters employees are allowed to eat one free meal during every shift, but it has to be “healthy.” They can’t just request french fries or unlimited chicken wings. Why? They need to maintain their good physique.

Employees are trained to ask for a customers number, if they try asking for theirs first. Afterwards, they are told to throw the number away. It’s a polite way of dodging the awkward question, and the customer will hopefully think the girl just simply lost the number.

Many Hooters locations offer discounted gym and tanning memberships, so the girls are motivated to keep their toned bodies in shape at all times. It’s hard to turn down all of the greasy food they are constantly surrounded by, so they deserve perks such as this!

There are actually more female managers than male managers in U.S. Hooters locations, and this is for obvious reasons. Having a female manager prevents any sexual harassment or even harmless dating between a male manager and a Hooters girl. It’s never good to mix business and pleasure!

A Hooters girl is told not to hug any customers. Sure, they may break this rule, but it’s definitely in the rulebook, clear as day. Even Justin Bieber gets turned down! He has to settle for an arm-around picture pose. This rule is in place to avoid any physical fraternization, innocent or not, between customers and employees.

Food safety? Nah. Employees of Hooters must wear their hair down when they are working a shift. It’s part of creating that attractive “Hooters look.” No hair nets will be seen at any Hooters location.



Occasionally, Hooters girls will wear themed uniforms specifically designed for certain groups of people or for certain holidays. Military soldiers and police officers are honored through this special tradition.

Every time a new employee is hired at Hooters, the girls all take a picture together. It is posted on social media and the “new girl” is briefly introduced. This is a way to make her feel welcome, and show that everyone is happy she is there.

A driven Hooters girl with a saleswoman mentality is actually given the better shifts if she can sell merchandise as well as she can sell beer. Free shirts and footballs are given to regulars who often come into Hooters and drop a lot of money on a dinner tab.

Ever seen a Hooters girl wearing a California shirt when she is serving you food in Orlando? That’s because Hooters girls are actually allowed to “swap shirts” with any other active Hooters employee at another location. The only exception is Vegas locations, who have different rules

In the not-so-busy hours of the restaurant, Hooters girls are known to take out board games and play them with each other and other customers. One Hooters girl mentioned a game of Hungry Hippos that she played with three friendly firefighters.


Cell phones are strictly prohibited from the floor while a Hooters girl is serving customers. They aren’t even allowed to carry it in the “off” mode in their server pouches. The only things they are allowed to carry in their pouches are pens, cash and coin change, and a notepad for recording menu orders.

Hooters locations in colder areas of the U.S., like in Colorado or Chicago, are allowed to wear either the long-sleeved version of the Hooters shirt or a Hooters jacket over their normal top. The managers know it gets cold, and they want the girls to be comfortable as the work.



These women are hired not to be waitresses, but to be entertainers. It is their job to sit down at your table and make you feel welcome. Also, every table must be visited by at least three other Hooters employees, not just the one taking down the orders and serving the food.


Though these uniforms are offered in a few sizes, none of them are really too big. So if you can’t fit in the biggest size they offer, you can’t work there. They also require a Hooters girl to stay in the same sized uniform throughout their time at Hooters, so if they gain weight, they don’t just get a bigger size. They get a talking to!


It is policy that at least one nearby Hooters girl yells out “Hi! Welcome to Hooters!” to a customer walking in. They must have a big smile on their face and look genuinely excited for the customer’s arrival to the restaurant. At the end of the shift, however, the shouts dwindle down and become less filled with energy.

The job of a Hooters girl involves building personal relationships with the customers. This includes the male and female customers, as well as children and elderly people. Everyone matters, and it is their job to make sure everyone feels special there.

Disregarding popular belief, there actually is no requirement on cup size at Hooters. Employers choose fun personalities and beautiful faces over cup size. A flat-chested girl with great charisma will certainly be chosen over a large-chested girl with a miserable attitude and work ethic.

An employer at Hooters also looks for personality over experience. It doesn’t matter if a waitress has worked at a different restaurant for eight years prior to applying to Hooters. If her personality doesn’t shine, they won’t want to hire her. They are more likely to choose someone with far less experience, but with a willing and eager mindset.

Thursday, September 21, 2017

Melania Bully Blind

The irony of Melania Trump’s anti-bullying speech at the United Nations on Wednesday was not lost on Twitter users.
The first lady told world leaders’ spouses that their focus must shift to what children are exposed to “on a daily basis through social media, the bullying, the experience online and in person.” But her well-intentioned address came just three days after her husband, renowned cyberbully President Donald Trump, had retweeted a meme that showed him hitting a golf ball which ended up striking Hillary Clinton:
Some tweeters suggested that Melania Trump might want to bring up the issue of

online bullying with her husband while others asked if there was a presidential

exemption.

Obama is, without question, the WORST EVER president. I predict he will now do something really bad and totally stupid to show manhood!

I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke.

Robert Pattinson should not take back Kristen Stewart. She cheated on him like a dog & will do it again--just watch. He can do much better!

@katyperry must have been drunk when she married Russell Brand @rustyrockets – but he did send me a really nice letter of apology!



.@katyperry Katy, what the hell were you thinking when you married loser Russell Brand. There is a guy who has got nothing going, a waste!


.@ariannahuff is unattractive both inside and out. I fully understand why her former husband left her for a man- he made a good decision.




If there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s talent. Right? Wrong, says Trump. After Meryl Streep condemned him (without ever speaking his name) at the 2017 Golden Globes ceremony, Trump took to social media to call her “overrated.” This is undeniable blasphemy, and is yet another example of his incredibly fragile ego.

An 'extremely credible source' has called my office and told me that @BarackObama's birth certificate is a fraud.

While @BetteMidler is an extremely unattractive woman, I refuse to say that because I always insist on being politically correct.

Trump's tweets in the 8 a.m. hour on Thursday said that "Morning Joe" is "poorly rated" (it's not) and that the hosts "speak badly of me" (that's true). He called both hosts disparaging names.
Trump claimed that Scarborough and Brzezinski courted him for an interview at Mar-a-Lago around the New Year's Eve holiday.
"She was bleeding badly from a face-lift. I said no!" the president wrote.


Sunday, September 17, 2017

The END is Here

A Christian numerologist claims that the world will end next Saturday when a planet will, supposedly, collide with Earth.
According to Christian numerologist David Meade, verses in Luke 21:25 to 26 are the sign that recent events, such as the recent solar eclipse and Hurricane Harvey, are signs of the apocalypse.
The verses read:
25: There will be signs in the sun, moon and stars. On the earth, nations will be in anguish and perplexity at the roaring and tossing of the sea. People will faint from terror, apprehensive of what is coming on the world, for the heavenly bodies will be shaken.'

"'26: Men’s hearts failing them for fear, and for looking after those things which are coming on the earth: for the powers of heaven shall be shaken.'

Sept. 23 is a date that was pinpointed using codes from the Bible, as well as a "date marker" in the pyramids of Giza in Egypt. 
Meade's views are not endorsed by Roman Catholic, Protestant or eastern Orthodox branches of Christianity.
Meade has built his theory on the so-called Planet X, which is also known as Nibiru, which he believes will pass Earth on Sept. 23, causing volcanic eruptions, tsunamis and earthquakes, according to British newspaper The Sun.
NASA has repeatedly said Planet X is a hoax.
For a certain branch of evangelical Christianity, Revelation 12:1–2, describes the beginning of what is known as the rapture and the second coming of Christ. 
The passage reads: "And a great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet, and on her head a crown of 12 stars. She was pregnant and was crying out in birth pains and the agony of giving birth."
In the passage, the woman is Virgo. On Sept. 23, both the sun and the moon will be in Virgo, as will the planet Jupiter. However, this occurrence happens naturally once every 12 years. There is also a rare alignment, known as "the Lion of the tribe of Judah," which the conspiracy theorists are hanging their hats on.
According to the Express, author Jonathan Sarfati wrote that the same planetary coincidence previously happened four times in the last millennium. 
"As usual with any astrology (or Christian adaptations of it), one cherry-picks the stars that fit the desired conclusion," Sarfati wrote, according to the Express. "There is nothing to suggest that 23 September is a momentous date for biblical prophecy, and Christians need to be careful about being drawn into such sensationalist claims."


Monday, September 11, 2017

TRUMP 9/11

WASHINGTON ― President Donald Trump on Monday commemorated the 16th anniversary of the Sept. 11 attacks, leading a moment of silence at the White House to mark the moment the first plane struck the North Tower of the World Trade Center in New York.
The president and first lady Melania Trump stood on the White House’s South Lawn amid a crowd that included Trump’s elder daughter, Ivanka, and his son-in-law Jared Kushner.
Trump spoke at a memorial ceremony at the Pentagon later Monday morning, honoring the nearly 3,000 victims of the attacks and their families.
Today, our entire nation grieves with you,” he said, reflecting on “the horror and anguish of that dark day” and praising the country’s perseverance and unity following the attacks.
His measured remarks on Monday notwithstanding, Trump has a history of making insensitive and false comments about the Sept. 11 tragedy.
The 2001 terrorist attacks were the subject of one of Trump’s most egregious lies during his presidential campaign. In November 2015, he claimed, without evidence, that “thousands and thousands” of Muslims in New Jersey had celebrated the news of the attacks.
I watched when the World Trade Center came tumbling down. And I watched in Jersey City, New Jersey, where thousands and thousands of people were cheering as that building was coming down,” Trump said at a campaign rally. “Thousands of people were cheering.”
The following day, Trump reiterated his lie, claiming that the supposed celebration “was well covered at the time.”
There were people that were cheering on the other side of New Jersey, where you have large Arab populations. They were cheering as the World Trade Center came down,” Trump said on ABC’s “This Week.”
The lie, which has been roundly debunked, appeared to originate from an article published a few days after the attacks, reporting that law enforcement officials had investigated “a number of people who were allegedly seen celebrating the attacks and holding tailgate-style parties on rooftops while they watched the devastation on the other side of the river.”
But Trump, as he frequently does, exaggerated the allegation in the story ― an allegation that was never substantiated. 
Following the rally in which he first peddled the lie, Trump mocked one of the journalists who wrote the original story, veteran New York Times reporter Serge Kovaleski, after Kovaleski himself affirmed that the story did not back up Trump’s lie.
I certainly do not remember anyone saying that thousands or even hundreds of people were celebrating,” Kovaleski said.
In response, Trump performed a disgusting imitation of Kovaleski, who has arthrogryposis, a congenital joint condition.
On the actual day of the attacks, Trump, a New York real estate mogul, tastelessly bragged about his downtown Manhattan building, 40 Wall Street.
Calling in to a New York TV news broadcast, as the station aired footage of the World Trade Center towers collapsing, Trump claimed that his property would now become the tallest building in the area.
40 Wall Street actually was the second-tallest building in downtown Manhattan, and it was actually, before the World Trade Center, was the tallest — and then, when they built the World Trade Center, it became known as the second-tallest,” he said. “And now it’s the tallest.”

Donald J. Trump 


@realDonaldTrump

@realDonaldTrump: I would like to extend my best wishes to all, even the haters and losers, on this special date, September 11th.”

Trump interview on 9/11: "[My building] was the 2nd-tallest in Manhattan... And now it’s the tallest." #NeverForget


Trump has frequently referred to the attacks on Twitter, his favorite medium of communication.
In 2011, he claimed that he’d foreseen the attacks.


@realDonaldTrump

I predicted the 9/11 attack on America in my book "The America We Deserve" and the collapse of Iraq in @TimeToGetTough.


Wednesday, September 06, 2017

TINDER POOP

Liam Smith, 24, of Bristol, England, was on a dinner date with a woman he met on Tinder when they returned to his flat. She took a poop in his bathroom but it wouldn't flush, so she decided to toss the feces out the window. From there, things became a bit crazy. Here is his story which apparently has been confirmed to be true:
"We had a lovely evening, and enjoyed each other's company very much. "After our meal, we repaired back to my house for a bottle of wine and a scientology documentary. "About an hour in to Louis Theroux and chill, my date got up to use the toilet. She returned with a panicked look in her eye, and told me she had something to tell me. "'I went for a poo in your toilet', she told me 'and it would not flush.
"She continued, I don't know why I did this, but I panicked. I reached into the toilet bowl, wrapped it in tissue paper, and threw it out of the window'."
"I was understandably concerned, and told her we would go outside, bag up the offending poo in the garden, bin it, and pretend the whole sorry affair had never happened.
"Unfortunately, owing to a design quirk of my house, the toilet window does not in fact open to the garden.
"Instead, it opens into a narrow gap of about a foot and a half, separated from the outside world by another (non-opening) double glazed window.
"It was into this twilight zone that my date had thrown her poo.
"As can be seen in the picture, the inside window opens at the top, into the gap that is separated from the garden by a non-opening double-glazed window pane.
"Seeing only one solution, I messaged our house group-chat, and went upstairs to find a hammer and chisel to smash open the window."
"Being an amateur gymnast, she was convinced that she could reach into the window and pull the poo out, using the tried and tested 'inside out bag as glove' technique.
"Unfortunately she couldn't reach. She climbed further in and had the same problem. Eventually I agreed to give her a boost up and into the window.
"She climbed in head first after her own turd, reached deeper into the window, bagged it up, and passed it out, over the top and back into the toilet from whence it came.
"She called out to me to help her climb out from the window, I grabbed her waist and I pulled. But she was stuck. Stuck fast.
"Try as we might, we could not remove her from the window. Shewas stuck fast, upside down in the gap.
"Unfortunately for my date, at this stage I could see only one way out of our predicament.
"She had been upside down in the window for around 15 minutes at this point, and I was starting to grow concerned for her health. I called the fire brigade.
"Bristol's finest were on scene sirens blaring in a matter of minutes.
"Once they had composed themselves after surveying the scene in front of them, they set to work removing my date from the window using all of their special firemen hammers and tools.
"It took them about 15 minutes.
"Unfortunately, although they rescued my date unharmed from what must have been a rather unpleasant confined space to find yourself in, in the process they had to completely destroy the window with their special fire tools.
"I'm not complaining, they did what they had to do. Problem is, I've been quoted north of £300 to replace the window.
Smith launched a GoFundMe campaign to pay for the broken window.

Sunday, September 03, 2017

Melania Trump Sunglasses




Watch this Melania Video. She's got a lot of Glass!  (I mean Class)  


 https://youtu.be/EcLVNlBsXmQ





Saturday, August 12, 2017

TRUMP Great

Donald Trump promised to Make America Great AGAIN.  We are battling the Ku Klux Klan.  We are threatening people with Nuclear Weapons.  People talking about FALL OUT SHELTERS.  I feel like He's put us back in the Sixties.  All we need is:

Bellbottoms
Black Lights
Go-Go Boots
Granny Glasses
Lava Lamps, Love Beads
Mood Rings
Platform Shoes
Slot Cars
Smiley Faces
Superballs
Tie Dye T-Shirts
The Twists
Troll Dolls and Turtlenecks

Thanks Donny

Thursday, August 03, 2017

HANDGUN WEDDING

Talk about a shotgun wedding.

Shortly after saying “I do,” a Tennessee bride was arrested for pulling a firearm out from beneath her wedding dress and pulling the trigger on her new hubby.




Police said Kate Elizabeth Prichard, 25, and her groom had started fighting only hours after their nuptials in Murfreesboro, Tennessee, according to news station WTVF.

The couple was drinking outside a local motel called the Clarion Inn when they began to fight, authorities said.


“She pulled out of her wedding dress a 9 mm pistol. Pointed it at her new husband’s head and pulled the trigger,” Murfreesboro Police Sgt. Kyle Evans told WTVF.

The gun, however, was not loaded, forcing the pistol-packing bride to load a round before reportedly firing a shot into the air.

“Responding officers let the husband know the honeymoon was over and his new wife was going to jail,” Evans said.

Authorities took Prichard, who was still in her gown, into custody and charged her with aggravated domestic assault. She was released from Rutherford County jail on $15,000 bond.

MEN ARE JUST DYING TO GET MARRIED TO HER

GROOM CALLED HIS MOM AND SAID, NO MOM, I HAVE NOT WED......  I HAVE BLED!

Donkey Love

An Arkansas man is behind bars after allegedly trespassing onto his neighbors’ property in order to sexually assault the couple’s donkeys. Police in Siloam Springs arrested Everett Lee Compton, Jr., 49, after he was allegedly caught abusing a donkey owned by Emert and Joyce Whitaker.

The Whitakers had previously told police that they have had problems with people harassing their animals for the past three years.

Police said Emert Whitaker photographed a man on his property on the mornings of May 27 and June 4.

The photos showed a man placing a bag over one donkey’s head and then rubbing his pelvis against the animal’s rear, according to ArkansasMatters.com.

The Whitakers also photographed the same man with the donkeys on July 5 and 6.  Police said the pictures showed the man ― later identified as Compton ― feeding a donkey from a bread bag while rubbing his pelvis against the animal.

HEE HAW!  HEE HAW !  HEE HAW!

I'M SORRY BUT I THINK I JUST GOT HIM 

REALLY HOT...........

He told the cops, "It's a JACKASSS.... 

JACKASS!

That guy better be A DEMOCRAT 

HEEE HAAAAAWWWWWW

Thursday, July 20, 2017

OJ TRUMP

Donald Trump is President!


And OJ Simpson is Free!

Isn't Life Sweet!

As Johnny said, "If the Toupee does not fit.  You must Comb Over!"

#CROOKEDKILLER

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Hack You

The British Parliament was hacked today and Government is in disarray.

All of the law makers emails were stolen.

One parliamentarian said, 

"It was either Kim Jong Un


Or Vladimir Putin



Or some smart-ass kid in his basement with a good computer!"