Tebow Out

Peyton Manning is in Denver talking with John Elway about Peyton replacing Tim Tebow as the number one quarterback in Denver.

I think Tim better get down on BOTH knees.  I think his call to God just got DROPPED.

Same Sex Fighting

They a fighting over same-sex mariage in Maine.
Hey, let them get married first, then they can fight all they want!

There was a shooting in an Oklahoma Courthouse today.
You litterally ask yourself, "Wae this the shooting from the day before?"
Or  "Which school are they locking down now?  Is that the same one as two days ago?"  This all has to slow down!

Gingrich Wife Simpsons

Does Newt Gingrich's wife

 resemble Mr. Burns of The Simpson's?

Just A Little?

Bullying

Dharun Ravi, the kid who web cam'ed Tyler Clementi who killed himself because the he was web cam'ed having gay sex at Rutgers University will probably go to prison and wind up having gay sex like he was going to laugh at Tyler having in his room.
Wow    Anal Karma   What goes around comes around and gets you right up the rear end!
And some big gang members will be laughing at him

Super Tuesday Putin

Russia Elections: Putin Wins, Critics Plan Protests
Putin plans swim across river with no shirt on!
Is that guy on steroids?  Or did he just hit his head somewhere?

Rick Santorum Defends Birth Control Position
You can control births by some Sex Position!


China Lead Pollution Reportedly Poisons Over 100 Children
They said those kids were "Lead Pollution Testers"

Romney's Washington Win Tightens Screws On Santorum
I thought Rick Santorum did not like anything dealing with Two Guys Screwing!

Catholic Cardinal Calls For 'Freedom Of Religion Battle'
98% of Catholic Woman say, "Whatever!"

America’s Most Fuel Efficient Cars
Are Parked!

Investigation: Saints Ran Bounty Program Rewarding Hits
The Saints Don't sound like Saints!

Kathryn Bigelow's Bin Laden Movie Running Into Trouble
What? Bin Laden didn't show up!

Craigslist Used To Find Dogs For Sex
And the yucky thing is that they were not just talking about unattractive people!

Drunk Zamboni Driver Busted For DUI
They suspected something when he tried to turn the entire ice rink into a giant Margarita!

CVS Accidentally Gives Kids Breast Cancer Medication Instead Of Fluoride Pills
The boys now have Large Breasts and plenty of cavities!

snooki prego

I didn't know they bred in captivity.
New Show
Baby Shore!

Crimefighter Miami

Miami valedictorian could be deported
He is just too smart for the Miami area!

Puppy wandering streets becomes top K-9 crime fighter
It worked out really well since they cut the police force by 50%. 
There's just A Dog walking around with a hat!

Community Infuriated by Serial Killer Tour
If you are a hooker in Long Island, try to take a long vacation!

Resolution Urges 'Personhood' Rights For Sperm'
How would you like to bring that up on the first date
Maybe Christian Mingle dot com
Where they Mingle Until HE Tingles

Mechanic Can Give Thumbs Up With His Toe
I don't know if that is actually considered a "Thumbs Up"
The good news
He can "Hitch-Hike" when wearing sandals!

Robots Can Apply For Driver's Licenses In Nevada
I had a Robot drive me once.
It was really my wife
Hung Over and at the wrong Time of the Month!!







.

Rush Bomb

So Rush Limbaugh had a bomb threat.
He called a woman bad names and is trouble.
Things are going The President's way.
The Republican Senator from Maine is giving up her seat.
Birth Control issues resolving.
The Stock Market is higher than 2008.
Unemployment is dropping.
Home prices are rising.
Detroit bailed out.
Osama dead.
Kadafi no more.
Republicans confused.  Chasing tail in a circle.
North Korea just gave up Nuke Threat.

Dead Monkee

Davy Jones of The Monkees died.  Hey, Hey a Dead Monkee.  People thought he Monkeed around.  He was too busy playin...  Too put anybody down

And it came out that Tiger Woods wanted to be a Navy Seal if not a Pro Golfer.
Problem was The Navy Seals didn't have enough LADIES in it.

The Leader of The Texas 7 Prison-Break Gang was put to death today.
Oh, by the way, they go by the name of The Texas 6 That Didn't-Really-Break-out-of-prison Gang now.

And what's with this Danica Patrick?  Has she ever won a race?  Is she just one big walking Go Daddy dot com advertisment?  She crashed in the second lap this time.  This morning she crashed leaving her garage.  We might have to check her license!