How to WIN LOTTERY

Here are things to do to win the lottery.  

Odds are 1 in 175 Million!

Better chance of being hit Crossing the Street

Being drafted by THE NBA

Crushed by an ASTROID is 1 in 700, 000

Having an 11th TOE

Being struck by an AIRPLANE falling from the sky..... TWICE

DIE/OR KILL someone driving to buy the lottery ticket   1 in 33 million

Here's More

Dying from being struck by lightning

Odds: 1 in 3 million

Source: Harvard School of Public Health

The chances of being hit by lightning at all over an 80-year lifetime are 1 in 10,000, according to the National Weather Service.

Drowning — or other beach-related fatalities

Odds: 1 in 2 million

Source: Florida Museum of Natural History, based on U.S. beach injury statistics in 2000

Being attacked by a shark

Odds: 1 in 11.5 million

Source: Florida Museum of Natural History

Dying from a bee sting

Odds: 1 in 6.1 million

Source: Harvard School of Public Health

Dying in a plane crash

Odds: 1 in 11 million

Source: PBS' "Nova," based on data from the U.S. Department of Transportation

Becoming president of the United States

Odds: 1 in 10 million

Source: International Business Times

Having conjoined twins

Odds: 1 in 200,000

Source: University of Maryland Medical Center

Being crushed and killed by a vending machine

Odds: 1 in 112 million

Source: Discovery News

Being killed using a right-handed product, if you're left-handed

Odds: 1 in 7 million

Source: Gizmodo

Hitting a hole-in-one on two consecutive, par-3 holes

Odds: 1 in 156 million

Source: U.S. Hole in One, which insures golf prizes for holes in one

Also of note, the chances of an amateur golfer making a single hole-in-one on a par-3 hole is about 1 in 12,500.

Hitting a deer while driving in Hawaii

Odds: 1 in 6,267

Source: State Farm, from a 2011 study on collissions between vehicles and deer, said to be least likely in the state of Hawaii.

Picking a perfect NCAA bracket

You're 13 times more likely to pick a perfect NCAA bracket. My recommendation is to go with the cutest mascots.

Odds: 13,460,000 to 1

Visiting the ER due to a pogo stick injury

You're 1,526 times more likely to visit the ER due to an injury from a pogo stick. Just say no to the pogo.

Being Canonized

You're almost 9 times more likely to be canonized. A boy can dream.

Odds: 20,000,000 to 1 

Dating a supermodel

You're 2,000 times more likely to be currently dating a supermodel. So you're saying I have a chance?

Odds: 88,000 to 1 

Being murdered

You're 9,777 times more likely to be murdered. But the odds even out A LOT if you know a guy with an old hockey mask and a machete. Oh... And if you live anywhere near Crystal Lake.

Odds: 18,000 to 1

Winning an Academy Award

You're 15,000 times more likely to win an academy award. Odds they like you? They really like you? Much, much worse.

Odds: 11,500 to 1

Marrying after 40

You're 123,000,000 times more likely to get married after the age of 40. Utah mothers everywhere can breath a sigh of relief. And Jen, just relax. It'll come.

Odds: 2.5 to 1

Dating a Millionaire

You're 818,600 times more likely to date a millionaire. And millions of college students wondering how they're going to pay off their student loans breath a sigh of relief.

Odds: 215 to 1 

Losing an appendage to a chainsaw

You're 39,426 times more likely to be seriously injured by a chainsaw. I keep writing my congressman about those outdated chainsaw control laws. When will they ever listen? 

Odds: 4,464 to 1 

Finding out your child is a genius

You're 704,000 times more likely to find out your child is a genius. And to think, I have four of them!

ALL IT TAKES IS A DOLLAR 

AND A DREAM.....

ESPECIALLY IF YOUR DREAM

IS TO LOOSE A DOLLAR!

GOOD LUCK

Stripper Valentine

Valentine's Day at The Strip Club

Ladies Half Off!!!!???????!!!!!!!!???????


Wait a Minute

I think on St. Valentine's Day

Strippers should TAKE IT ALL OFF!!

I might be wrong

Sunflower Squirrel Funny Workout

Bruce Jenner Crash

Bruce Jenner was in a car accident where 5 people were injured and one person died the other day.

Bruce is also transitioning to become a woman.  

Could he already be driving like a LADY!

As Aerosmith said,

"Dude, drives like a lady"

Just kidding ladies!

Well, check out these statistics from a Kansas State University study. Researchers found several differences in the types of crashes between young men and women, including:

• Young females were 66 percent more likely to wear a seat belt than young males.
• Young females were 28 percent more likely to drive on a restricted license than young males.
• Young female drivers had more crashes at intersections and collisions with pedestrians.
• Young males had more crashes after sunset than young females.
• Young female drivers were more likely to be involved in crashes during weekdays, while young male drivers were more likely to be involved in crashes during the weekend.
• Young male drivers had more off-road crashes than young females.
• I’ll admit that, Men are more likely to engage in risky behavior, for example having conversations including the phrase “Hey, hold my beer and watch this.”

But the news release didn’t mention alcohol use or other dangerous behaviors. And young female drivers and young male drivers seemed to perform about equally poorly in the results.

The researchers, Niranga Amarasingha and Sunanda Dissanayake of Kansas State University, reviewed records from the Kansas Accident Reporting System that covered the 138,3888 crashes occurring between 2007 and 2011, in which the drivers were between 15 and 24 years old, and in which the accidents involved injuries or moderate property damage.

“There are often different risk factors for young male and young female drivers because their behavior and attitude are generally different,” Dissanayake said. “This may help explain why one gender is more likely to be involved in a certain type of crash. For example, young males may have more off-road crashes because this crash type is more frequently involved with speeding on rural roads — a driving habit exhibited more by young males than young females.”

The value of the findings therefore would be to categorize the type of instruction emphasized to young drivers of a particular gender. “You guy need to buckle up more and quit racing down those back roads.” “You ladies need to be more careful as you navigate those intersections and watch out for people walking in the street.

Suge Knight Isis

This guy, Marion Knight, ran over two guys and killed them with a big truck at a film shoot.  Then he ran over them again!

Isis just burned alive a Jordanian pilot.  And they have beheaded and barbarically Killed many others.

I think Marion might be able to get a job with Isis if he ever gets out of prison.  Or is he works for Isis in prison.

Is this all because your mother named you Marion?

Oh they are going to have plenty of those kind of thinks to stick in his mouth...................As Vanilla Ice said, "Hang over this balcony Marion!"  Or maybe it's Vanilla Icis.....