Erect Weiner

I meant ELECT Weiner.  Anthony Weiner, disgraced candidate for Mayor of New York City.
I said Candidate... not... Can He Date!

He has not had an erection in a long time...I mean an Election...

If Weiner wins, The City would suffer erectile dysfunction.... I mean Electile Dysfunction....

He wishes his erection were held today... I mean his Election.....

He said, "It may be hard to win
... but at least it will be hard!"

Kidnap Jodi Arias

It would have been cool if this Castro guy in Cleveland

who kidnapped the three girls and kept them for ten years actually kidnapped Jodi Arias.  

She would have stabbed his ass 60 times, chopped of his head  and then shot him 20 times just for the fun of it in the first week!   

Castro would have definitely put Jodi in the "Please Re-Kidnap This Person" section of Craig's List after a couple of days.  


Jodi would of had Castro and the other guys chained up in the basement and not let them have a single friend on Facebook for years.

 She could be really mean sometimes. 

BOMBER FAMILY

This is a family photo of the Boston Bombing suspect as a child.

Maybe he would not have been a bomber if

His Mom didn't look like AMY WINEHOUSE

and

His Dad like Adolf Hitler..........

Killer Kids

A 4 YEAR OLD kid shot and killed a 48 year old woman in Tennessee today

and 

A 4 YEAR OLD kid shot and killed a 6 year old kid in Toms River, NJ today.


GUN VIOLENCE LESSON?

TOO MANY Guns!    
and 
ANY Gun Kills!

 or


If a 4 year old asks you for more soda
GIVE IT TO HIM

Wear Bullet Proof Vests when dining at 
CHUCK E CHEESE

Hope 4 year old forgot and loaded
GUN with CRAYONS

If 4 year old throws a TANTRUM
make sure their High Capacity AMMO CLIP
is limited to only 10 ROUNDS

And finally,
Stay away from ARMED 4 year old kids

WATCH: http://youtu.be/hLUSAE9-MVg

Gay Marriage and Abortion

Hey

Won't Same Sex Marriage solve the Abortion Issue?

If everyone that is married is the same sex,

then we won't have a need for Abortion!

We won't be having babies!

Everbody Is The Same Sex....

HEY!  Where Do I Stick THIS THING?!?!?!?

Just a thought

A Stupid Thought

New Fifty Shades of Grey and Richard simmons

                 

                    AS RICHARD SIMMONS!!!!!

WHICH INVOLVES TAYLOR SWIFT AND
                         A GOAT!!!!!!!!

                  


                   She really really really wants
                  Michele Obama's BANGS!!!!!

Hammer Feet and The View

                       Being arrested has a
           LIFE CHANGING effect on you

WAIT

They were actually Michael Moore's REAL FEET

WAIT

              She saw THIS GUY in her sleep

Pistorius Security

Zuckerberg, katherine webb, buscemi,

And gives $15.00 to This woman for MAKEUP

=================================================================

And had a Really WELL-DRESSED Baby


====================================
And finally

Chuchi, Another Dog With A Human Face, Looks Like Steve Buscemi

CHUCHI IS MORE HANDSOME

Clinton, Dog Gone, Topless Robber

      Number 1...   Driving a GETAWAY Car
                              -or-
Number 2....Having a Cat drive him to McDonalds

            Buying a PANTS SUIT Factory

                  As far as I'm concerned,
                the MAJOR MISTAKE was 
         She kept her BRA and SWEATER on
                           for far too long

Pistorius Valentine Phillips

                     For naming him the SAME NAME TWICE!

He thought those GLASSES could SEE through her CLOTHES!

         You should see how 'NUMB' his GIRLFRIEND is!

Drew, Jenny and Strip

 

 

 

That "Procedure" was to QUIT Drinking and STOP talking like a 12 year old!

She "Believed" everyone at the event should be NAKED!

The "Real" problem was that she couldn't
HITCH-HIKE home!
 
The Strip Club told her it was part of their
NEW EMPLOYEE WEIGHT-LOSS Program!

New Republican Party

They just announced the New Republican Party Ticket

Donald Trump for President

Ted Nuggent for Vice President

and

Rand Paul for the guy that gets everybody TEA.....

Let the Circus begin

The Circus has already begun.........

Pope Update

The Pope had a heart implant 5 years ago.

He had the battery replaced last week.

Did He get one of those

BOING 787 Batteries?

 

New POPE

The Pope is quiting.

Did he walk into God's Office and Quit?

Wonder if he got a buy out... 400 years in heaven, free rides in the POPEMOBILE and health insurance.

He claims He is "Just Too POOPED to POPE."

The only thing he asked for was that BETTY WHITE show up at his RETIREMENT PARTY

I mean OMG.......REALLY!

And he was a SHOE salesman.... Maybe she said her shoes were TOO TIGHT!  He said, "I could fix that!"

Casey Anthony Legal

Casey Anthony's lawyer said that Casey would make a great Paralegal because she is intelligent and determined and she will kill your ass if you spilled your milk in the courtroom! 

Patraeus TELL ALL

The reasons why General David Patraeus said he Cheated with Paula Broadwell:

His WEE WEE went AWOL

She really knew how to DEPLOY his TROOP

She was like a TERRORIST in BED

They both went to BOOTIE CAMP

She always made his THINGY stand at ATTENTION

Her BOOBIES were TRAPS

She liked the SIZE of his UNIT

She thought he was a Great TAILGUNNER

He got excited when she would AIR STRIP

She liked it when he showed her his WEAPON

Although he was a GENERAL he would DO HER in PRIVATE

His DRONE was LONG but he did not like to Fort BRAGG

And Finally, Women in COMBAT !!!  That will make it really EXCITING !!!

Where do I sign up

And P.S. Tell Manti Te'o

"The Real Ones are TWICE as much TROUBLE!