Gay Marraige NY/NJ

New Jersey Govenor Chris Christie says Marriage is a Union between and A Man and A Woman.

In HIS case a very FAT MAN and A Woman!
(Did he say UNION?)

The Govenor said, "If God wanted Gays to marry he would have created more DIVORCE LAWYERS!"

Mitt Romney defines Marriage as a union between one man and five women.  None of which are named Sarah Palin!

Anthony Weiner defined Marriage as a union between one cell phone camera and any woman not working for Hillary Clinton on Twitter!

And finally, The Catholic Church came out against Gay Marriage saying It could not afford to pay for all of those Honeymoons for all of those Priests!

End of World omission

Harold Camping, the 90 year old radio evangelist, who predicted the World Will End on May 21, 2011

had a Stroke.  The world did not end as we know. 

I think Mr. Camping fell asleep while reading the scripture about the World Ending and did not see the last two words in the sentence....

"IT WILL BE THE FINAL DAYS AND THE BAD SEED IN THE WORLD SHALL DISSAPPEAR AND RAPTURE AND DEATH WILL PREVAIL AND THE WORLD
SHALL END 0N MAY 21, 2011
FOR YOU!"

 Oh.... I see what the problem was...
GOD Tweeted it to him and there were more than 140 Characters!

Bummer Dude

Arnold Has It MAID

Arnold Schwartzenegger had sex with the maid

Dominique Strauss-Kahn from the IMF Fund forced sex on a maid in his $3000 a night Manhattan hotel room.

Egyptian banker Mahmoud Abdel Salam Omar assaulted a maid in a cheaper $900 dollar a night hotel room two weeks later.

Why do old rich guys who have beautiful wives need to have sex with the maid?

These guys just want to have sex with someone who can clean up after them.

Is that you Mom?  No, it's your MAID!

Maybe it's a Drool think...  Things keep dripping out of your mouth when you hit a certain age.
It's nice to have someone near who can whipe it up!

The hot new pick up-line is, "Would you like to come up to my room?
And clean it!!!"

It's not that these women give great HEAD, they give great VACUUM!

These guys don't ask, "Is she great in bed?"
They ask, "Is she great at making up the bed?"

And excuse me but does Arnold's maid look alot like
the OCTOMOM'S MOM

He's lucky she stopped at ONE